MarryCap

Women Date Iron Man but Marry Captain America

Maybe you’re all sick of hearing about Captain America. But not sick of looking at him, right?

"Look at those guns."
“Look at those guns.”

But this post isn’t about Cap. Or his falling out with Iron Man in the newest Captain America film. This blog is about a woman’s need to find a hero.

Yes, this is probably the point where all the “I don’t need a man” women will want to stop reading. I won’t make women out to be weak and needy in this post, but I will expound on proven psychological needs.

Iron Man’s Appeal

During one of my lengthy Twitter conversation with an author friend of mine, she admitted Iron Man is a more interesting character. During the breakup of the Avengers, she sided with him mostly because she liked his attitude.

Tony Stark is the king of snark. His deadpan sarcasm adds plenty of entertainment value in the Marvel universe.

Funny, sure. But also a player. Even if he loves Pepper, he can’t commit to what she wants.

Maybe that means she isn’t the right woman for him. But it could also mean he’s not the man for a long-term relationship.

Nothing wrong with that. As long as you’re on the dating stage and aren’t looking for anything permanent.

For me? Dating was the interview process for finding Mr. Right.

Why Cap is better for the Long Term

Enter my ideal hero: Captain America. Decades encased in ice couldn’t change the love he had for Peggy Carter.

Let’s consider that Steve Rogers grew up in a different culture than Tony Stark. There were no electronic gadgets. He could barely scrape together money for bus fare.

It was a time when women wanted a man to take care of them. This wasn’t about jobs or perceived weakness. Women had value as the queen of a man’s domain.

Every king needs a queen, right? (Although it doesn’t appear that every queen needs a king if you look at matriarchal monarchies. That’s a different topic.)

Steve Rogers stands up for those who need an advocate. He’s willing to throw himself on a grenade for a group of strangers. His life has value only as long as he can help other people defeat their bullies.

The reason he was attracted to Peggy Carter was because she didn’t need to be rescued. But Steve saw her as someone who DESERVED to be protected.

He respected her for who she was. She hated that he wanted to protect her because she thought it meant he considered her as less, as needy. But his charm won her over once she realized his respect knew no bounds.

She could see that for the long haul, Steve would treat her right, stand by her and put her needs above his own (although not above those of the world when it needed saving).

Iron Man or Captain America

What’s your opinion?

Do you think Iron Man would be more fun on a date than Captain America?

Or maybe, like me, you’d prefer a man whose goal is to be YOUR hero. He’s not worried so much about saving the world as making it a place fit for his queen.

Maybe this means I wouldn’t marry either of these guys.

I’ve already found my hero. And married him.

And aren't we a happy couple?
And aren’t we a happy couple?

Let Cap save the world (it needs saving for sure). Meanwhile, my superhero makes my favorite breakfast on the weekends.

What do you think? Is Captain America marriage material? Or would you take Iron Man instead?

Who knew there was so MUCH to be thankful for?

July buzzes along. Maybe things are heating up weather-wise where you live.

In my neck of the world, I like a little sunshine with my summer. Blue skies dazzle my personality. In short, sunny days make me smile.

Here’s what I had to be thankful for this week:

Monday

D200

Thinking of a hidden lake in Colorado. What’s the most beautiful place you’ve climbed high to see?

Tuesday

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My weakness for ice cream is genetic. I inherited it from my mother’s side of the family. I love Tillamook’s Brown Cow. What’s your flavor of choice?

Wednesday

D202

For the love of the game…some have gotten shoulders x-rayed, broken toes, or worn icepacks over their eyes.

Thursday

D203

Which is the reason I ascribe to the philosophy that there is no such thing as owning too many pairs of shoes.

Friday

D204

In fact, I’m dreaming of watching my Giants take home another World Series Championship come October.

What about you? What makes you pause and say “thanks” right now?

Everyday Heroes – or Wonder Woman goes ninja

Heroes are everywhere. They might not have super powers, but they do amazing things.

With the advent of my new log-line, I’ve decided that I want to feature everyday heroes on my site. The trouble is, I spend most of my hours behind a desk and computer working on manuscripts.

Yes, I just said I don’t get out much.

So I need your help.

Have you heard of an amazing everyday hero? The kid who stood up to the neighborhood bully and got a black and bloody nose for his trouble. Pet heroes work. If there was a cat who brewed and delivered mochas, I’d consider that pretty blog-worthy.

Check out my first feature along these lines.

Today, I’m going to share this cool video. Mostly it’s because I’m enamored with anything Wonder Woman these days.

These amazing sparkly shoes prove the point
These amazing sparkly shoes prove the point

Ninja

My husband watches this show on occasion. I’ve glimpsed a few runs when I looked up from whatever book I’m reading at the moment.

I would have loved to see this Wonder Woman complete this course.

Very few women can do it. The fact she put on the costume and ran the gamut says more than words alone.

Working out to be Fit

These obstacle courses are like parkour for marathon athletes. I don’t mean runners. I mean people who would do Iron Man in Hawaii and then go surfing to unwind.

I’m all about working out to stay in shape. (Also it allows me to eat chocolate without exchanging my jeans for a larger size.) I don’t know what compels people to train to complete something like these courses.

Life is enough of an obstacle course with out signing up for one voluntarily.

What do you think? Do you watch American Ninja Warriors? What do you think about being fit to live versus living to workout in the extreme?

Why our World isn’t ready for Superheroes

No_Superheroes

In a world where people cry over dead gorillas and ignore starving or abused children, we need heroes. Now more than ever. But the world isn’t ready for superheroes.

Thanks to my new site tagline (thanks Social Media Jedi Kristen Lamb), Holding out for a Hero, there is likely to be more posts about what it means to be a hero, heroes in real life and so on.

If you don’t like Captain America, I promise not to make it all about him. If you prefer the anti-hero character type, I’m happy to direct you to some other site.

In my world, good and evil have distinct lines. Evil is never based on personal opinion or preference but by the clear and present danger it causes.

Now, to get this post back on track. There are three major reasons it’s obvious our world isn’t ready for superheroes. I will be using film and real-world examples to reinforce my points. (There will be Captain America references – so sue me!)

Media Inflammation

Everyone is plugged in to the internet. Our phones notify us of updates to social media or our news sites. If we want to know the score for the big game, it’s a click or two away. (And there’s an app for that!)

There’s nothing wrong with being informed, but how well should we trust our sources of information? After all, who didn’t see the posts claiming Jackie Chan died a few months back. Some things are pure hype.

And other posts are an attempt to get a reaction. When I wrote this post, various articles about the Stanford University rapist bogged down my Facebook news feed.  Oh, and the gorilla incident I mentioned in the opening paragraph.

The articles became memes touting personal opinions – and calls for crucifixion of the criminal and the judge who gave him a “light” sentence. Whether I agree with these sentiments or not, the fact that a crime like this can blow up to become a worldwide discussion topic illustrates my point. (According to statistics, 300,000 rapes occur on US university campuses every year, but we’re only hearing about this ONE.)

The Fear of Power

With great power comes great responsibility – Uncle Joe Parker

People who have power fear people who might gain more power. And governments tend to be the biggest fraidy cats of all. This is the reason why information is controlled in so many parts of the world.

Because knowledge is power. If you know the truth, you can act upon it. If the truth can be concealed or packaged as a falsehood, then knowledge loses its edge.

Image from Marvel-movies
Image from Marvel-movies

In Captain America: Civil War, this truth was clearly demonstrated. After an accident during the apprehension of a terrorist, the United Nations met in an uproar. How dare The Avengers have collateral damage during their mission! Who even gave them permission to go into an African country anyway?

The governments feared the power of The Avengers (and they should). However, their fear wasn’t based in reality. If the team hadn’t stopped the terrorists, biological warfare would have been unleashed elsewhere in the world. Thousands of innocents would have suffered and died.

The UN didn’t care about the outcome, they wanted to control the power. What if The Avengers decided to step into the UN’s business? Who could stop them? But if the UN controlled their missions, the balance of power shifted into their favor.

Don’t be fooled. I used a fictitious example to prove this point, but the news headlines talk about dictators, warlords and plenty of others who exemplify this truth.

Just call us Sue-Happy

Think about some of the amazing rescues you’ve seen in superhero movies or the comics. These are when average people are saved from fires, explosions, criminals and accidents.

Now imagine this scenario. Spiderman sweeps into a burning building and removes two children, an elderly couple and even a cat from the flames. Just in time, too. The building collapses.

What if there was another unconscious person inside? Their family is incensed that Spidey discriminated against them by rescuing a stupid cat instead of their uncle.

And they sue him. Or the fire department. Or whoever they think they can get the money from.

You get burns from HOT liquid?

If you think I’m exaggerating, let me remind you that McDonald’s paid millions to a woman who burned herself on their coffee. Why did she win such a silly lawsuit? Because there was nothing WARNING her that the coffee was hot.

Seriously? Because even a two-year-old understands that something on an electrical burner is HOT.

Perhaps these lawsuits wouldn’t happen because who knows who Spiderman really is. But there would be even more pressure to discover his identity. Would it keep him from making his nightly runs stopping crime and rescuing victims?

Maybe. Maybe not.

In any case, these are only three reasons that screamed out when this topic jumped to the forefront of my mind.

What other reasons are there that might hold superheroes back? What do you see in our world that deters heroics more than it encourages them?

Try Some Saturday Gratitude

Another week in 2016 is gone.

I’m feeling a little whiplashed from the speed of time. I mean, remember when it seemed like it took forEVER for a year to go by? Back when you counted them by birthdays?

Now I have to do advanced math to figure out my age.

And the only reason I’m anticipating the next birthday is because I get a trip to Hawaii in the bargain.

Without further grumbling, here are six reasons to be grateful this week:

Monday

D193

I had a HORRIBLE Monday this week, but I got up and faced down the day anyway.

Tuesday

D194

I really need some girlfriend giggle time.

Wednesday

D195

It’s heating up in the world of Giants’ Baseball. Expect to see some memes. This one is a hat-tip to Old Men’s Softball.

Thursday

D196

I know some everyday heroes. I bet you do too. Don’t let their deeds go unacknowledged.

Friday

D197 This meme needs no additional explanation. Every person who has ever gone on a diet can relate. (Replace chocolate with chips or whatever your food-based weakness is.)

Saturday

I had a really HORRID Monday this week, but I got up and faced the day anyway.
Swing away. And I say the same to my SF Giants. Go boys. Best record in the league.

What other reasons can you think of for being grateful? Any of these memes stand out for you?

WWDT

You Will Tell the Truth by Wonder Woman

The bad guys are holding out. Torture is messy and deplorable. In waltzes Wonder Woman to save the day.

You know what she’s going to do- whip out the golden rope and lasso the criminal. This is not “truth serum” you might be able to fight off. This thing has magical powers.

Image from wikia.com

Wouldn’t you like to borrow that thing? Just for a day or two? Who would you interview if they had to tell the truth?

Politicians

Is there such a thing as an honest politician? Have you ever noticed how many politicians were lawyers in their pre-election lives?

Somewhere in there is a correlation.

You know, I don’t want to clump all politicians together. Maybe the ones who never make the news or have big election campaigns are Honest Abe clones. There’s an exception to every generalization.

And maybe this habit of saying the opposite of what you said last week is just for election years. Or in the race for president.

I’m afraid that too many of these political forerunners have convinced themselves their lies and half-truths (also a lie) are true.

After all, isn’t truth relative?

*Chokes on that question*

I’m almost afraid to hear what these men and women would say when under the power of WW’s lasso.

Of course, whatever it is, it couldn’t make me want to vote for them any less than all the blunders and misspeaks published daily by the media. Could the truth really be more horrible than their web of deceit?

Maybe I don’t want to know the answer.

Employers

I am my own employer. But it hasn’t always been this way.

And there were times when I wanted a straight answer about the future of my place in the company.

“You’re doing great. Here’s a review that says you “exceed” every expectation.”

The next day, a pink slip waits on the desk.

If I am so amazing at my job, why did I just lose it?

Hiding whether or not there will be pay raises or bonuses is also irritating. If you know the scoop, spill it. What’s the big deal? Are you afraid I might QUIT if you don’t pay me what I’m worth (because you can’t AFFORD it).

Family Members

I’m not saying I have family members who avoid telling the truth. And certainly none of them tell outright lies.

Do I want to know what they really think about me?

Not so much.

In fact, I’m pretty sure I don’t really care. And when I do, I can ask my sister and cousin (both of whom are reading this), and be guaranteed to get a straight-up answer. Even if I wanted them to sugarcoat it.

So sorry. Don’t ask for my opinion unless you’re ready to hear it.

What about you? If you could borrow WW’s magic lasso, who would you want to interview? What if the rope was used on YOU?

This Mom is my kind of Hero

Mountain lion, cougar, jaguar…a serious woodland predator

All of us are holding out for a hero. In real life we admire the people who go above and beyond. In our fantasy realities (whether film or book), we expect the good guy to save the world while showing us the mud on his face.

What amazes me is that we are surrounded by everyday heroes. These people don’t get the applause of the media or the acclaim of notoriety. Which is probably the way they like it.

Sometimes they make the news, though. It might only be a thirty-second spot in between the tirade about political mudslinging and another stormy weather report, but it makes me want to watch the news.

But I don’t. I read one newspaper. And I trust that media group to shuffle news stories they think I might enjoy into my email inbox.

That’s exactly where I saw this one.

Mama Bear Takes on a Cougar

In Colorado, two boys played outside. You know, like most kids used to do back before video games and other electronics warped their minds. (Whoops! Not the subject of this post. *reels in ire*)

When the screaming began, the mom who was busy working on maintaining her home and feeding her family (a full-time gig) rushed outside.

Did her legs buckle when she saw a mountain lion on top of her youngest son? Maybe her heart tried to long jump out of her chest. Her stomach plunged toward her feet.

And then she roared.

Because that’s what mama bears do when someone messes with one of their cubs.

And this one-hundred percent heroic all-human mother rushed the cougar. The beast probably outweighed her. It’s massive claws wreaked havoc on her son’s clothes. And those teeth? And they were snarling not smiling.

Not saying the cougar was this big, but it wasn’t a house cat

With her bare hands she beat the wild animal off her son. Not with a frying pan or a baseball bat. This angry mama put her OWN claws out and let that cat have a taste of her personal brand of martial arts.

I can picture her screaming at the fleeing backside of the wild cat, “Don’t mess with my cubs!”

Because if you’ve seen a mama bear in protection mode, it’s enough to send most other wild animals running.

Motherhood takes Heroics

While I’m in awe of this true story, I admit I’m pretty impressed with most moms. Even if they don’t destroy wild beasts with their bare hands.

Moms know that love is about sacrifice. They’re willing to take the gift card meant to buy them something nice at the department store and spend it on new shoes their kid needs for soccer. If there’s not enough chicken to go around the dinner table, mom’s not that hungry anyway.

When their kids need a ride, mom dons her chauffeur’s cap, even if it means cashing in pop cans to afford the fuel. Cupcakes are needed for school the next day? In the old days, mom would stay up late baking them from scratch and making thick homemade frosting to slather on them. These days, such a request means another trip to the grocery store. (Didn’t I go there yesterday?)

Sleep goes away when a child is sick and needs monitoring and soothing and another dose of ibuprofen.

Showers might be short and cold when mom takes the last one of the morning (and for this reason I love my tankless hot water heater-no end to hot showers).

This sounds mundane next to the mountain lion story, I know. But have you seen a soccer mom transform into a mother bear when someone bullies her kid?

And those are the sort of moms kids need and deserve. A mother who puts the child’s welfare above her own.

And Lord help anyone who tries to hurt her babies.

 

 

It’s a short work week – and other reasons to be grateful

Another Friday. Another week of life slid past. Where did it go?

Maybe the week seemed short because there were only four work days.

Or we could be getting old.

Nah! Short work week all the way.

Here’s this week’s gratitude memes in review (only five since it IS a short week and all):

Monday

Do you light off fireworks? My kids are adults and they still play with sparklers.
Do you light off fireworks? My kids are adults and they still play with sparklers.

Tuesday

Most of the time my cat lays UNDER my lounger, but he's keeping my company.
Most of the time my cat lays UNDER my lounger, but he’s keeping my company.

Wednesday

Wash away the dead weight, my friend. Be free to pursue your dreams.
Wash away the dead weight, my friend. Be free to pursue your dreams.

Thursday

I apologize to all the golfers and fishermen. Your good times bore me.
I apologize to all the golfers and fishermen. Your good times bore me.

Friday

Hey but I'm outside getting my daily dose of Vitamin D so I'll stop complaining now
Hey but I’m outside getting my daily dose of Vitamin D so I’ll stop complaining now

What are you feeling thankful for this week? You made it through another one. It’s the weekend.

Life is short. Celebrate everything.

WWDT

At the Mall with Wonder Woman

Welcome to What Would Wonder Woman Do, my new Thursday blog series. Some might claim that Wonder Woman and I are pretty close to the same person.

I mean born in 1966 and all.

But when it comes to shopping, Wonder Woman and I might not do the mall together.

What We Like

This is where WW and I don’t see eye to eye.

I like browsing through all the racks. And if they’re handing out free makeup application lessons, I’m in.

Sure, I’d like to buy into her line, “Why would you cover up your natural beauty?” but I’m not getting any younger.

Even though we both were born in 1966, WW hasn’t aged a day. Those comic writers keep her looking wrinkle-free and lithe.

Or maybe that’s her amazing (Amazonian?) genetics?

It seems we both tend to be from the “get in, get what you need and get out” school of shopping. If I don’t have a list to follow, I will either buy everything that’s on sale or nothing at all.

What We Don’t Like

Manequins. Those things are beyond creepy.

Pushy salespeople who say anything to get you to buy their products. I mean, why choose between Cinnamon and Cranberry? Buy both lipsticks because you’ll get 50 percent off your third item.

Perfume being sprayed in our face. Talk about making me sneeze. Even walking through a cloud of it and the toxicity gives me an instant headache.

Rude people who want to ruin the experience. They can cut you off, slam you with their bags, stomp on your toes or walk up to the register like you haven’t been waiting patiently for your turn.

And then there’s the Parking

I can be directionally challenged.

You know how you can press a button on your key fob and your car chirps? This feature was designed for me. Seriously. Why? Because I have been known to
1. Walk down several rows of vehicles looking for my car
2. Try to open a car that looks like mine but is actually NOT.

In the video, WW uses her Amazonian strength to move the idiot blocking the parking garage. I wish. Believe me laying on the horn doesn’t get the same results.

And you can bet she can find her vehicle without a problem. An invisible jet? And I wander aimlessly like a blind person now.

In short, WW can take me to the mall and handle all the rude people, but I think she’d better wait in the car. Or is that an invisible jet?

How do you picture a Wonder Woman trip to the shopping mall? Or maybe she’s a mega-store sort of shopper.

 

american-flag-2

Happy Birthday America! And What’s new on my Blog

God bless America! The “land of the free and the home of the brave.”

It all began on this day in 1776. A bunch of revolutionaries wrote up a fancy document and sent it off to the King of England, who ruled them at the time.

I’m talking about the Declaration of Independence. But independence isn’t so easily won as that. Winning freedom from oppression takes more than a piece of paper.

This document started our nation on it’s Freedom March

It would be a few more years before the U.S. Constitution was drafted and the United States of America became an independent nation.

So, happy birthday, Miss America. I’m still proud to be an American even if I shudder at some of the problems in America.

Light off an extra fire cracker for me.

The NEW Me

Logo - New Color

Look at the pretty red to pink header on my page. Doesn’t it scream for attention?

And did you notice the new tag-line for my site? Maybe you even voted for it when I was polling my Facebook friends.

Holding out for a Hero.

Has an excellent ring doesn’t it? Makes you think of anything? If I say I write romance or fantasy or inspirational fiction, the line still makes sense. It’s all-inclusive.

And since you’ve been seeing plenty of posts about Captain America and the idea of being a superhero, it makes everything clearer.

I hope.

I’m trying to streamline my author brand. By choosing colors and a tag-line that speaks to the heart of my message, I’m hoping to find my niche, make a connection or just settle in with an audience.

Special Blog Series

Beginning this week, I’m going to start a series of posts to fit the theme “What Would Wonder Woman Do?” I got this idea from a discarded tag-line during the process of honing in on the perfect fit.

Since I’m trying to make all my posts have something to do with heroes, this seems perfect.

Look for this meme on Thursdays, and you’ll know my take on something from Wonder Woman’s worldview is about to follow.

WWDT

Another series inspired by rejected tag-lines is “Between the Lines.” I’m not sure when I’ll begin posts with that theme but they will be the midweek post once Wonder Woman is exhausted.

Does Wonder Woman ever need a break? This one does.

Your Input

Beginning this month, if you follow via email, you’ll notice that I’m returning to posting three days per week. I’m not sure how long I’ll be able to keep that up.

Mondays will be my regular posts. Thursdays will be my What Would Wonder Woman Do series (until I deplete my creative brain on that topic). On Friday or Saturday, I’ll post “The Week In Gratitude” or something like that. It will be the gratitude memes for the week.

How does all this sound?

I don’t hear much from the readers of my blog. I tell myself it’s because you’re delighted with the content I’m providing. If it’s because you’re bored or aren’t reading it, I hope this change will inspire renewed interest.

If you have ideas for series themes, let me know. If there are other topics you wish I’d address, feel free to tell me about it. The comments on this post is the perfect place for that. Or use the contact form from the “Author Info” page.

So What Would Wonder Woman do if she were you?